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Do you remember when I asked you to give me your opinion? That's right, me neither.

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Joke about bar
A man walks into a bar and orders a shot of whiskey then looks into his pocket.
He does this over and over again.
Finally, the bartender asks why he orders a shot of whiskey and afterwards look into his pocket.
The man responded, "I have a picture of my wife in there and when she starts to look good then I'll go home."
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Hard work pays off in the future. Lolling on the couch pays off right now.

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Quote about women, men
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
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